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Colonel Slade

Colonel Slade Slingerland served in the service of his country for forty years. He and the army fit each other like a glove and the crisp regimentation of military life suits him to a tee. His mandatory retirement doesn’t fare well with him however, and since his dutiful army wife Nettie recently passed away he does feel a bit “lost”. You’ll never hear Slade complain or verbalize his feelings though because he feels that kind of thing is for the “namby pamby” wimps who whine in the trenches and can’t suck it up and take what life dumps on you.

His beloved dog Jarhead tries to keep him company and he whiles away the time watching the History channel or reading biographies of the likes of Patton, Rommel, and MacArthur. He somehow misses both giving orders and taking them. He doesn’t even like wearing civilian clothes and only wears his fatigues unless he’s receiving company.

Here he’s suited up for an upcoming visit from his only daughter Myrtle and her prissy deadbeat of a husband Percy.” 

(see price guide under “About Us/ Pricing” section)


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